blue on black.report.8.29.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

For the first day in a while I was 100% sober across the board, it was challenging especially at the end of the day but it felt good to fall asleep whole instead of fractured.

Plan of Action

Pray
Submit meal plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts
Attend 9:45 meeting, be of service
Read OA Daily Readers
Read 2 pages in BB
Read 2 pages in 12/12 to continue step work
Listen to past news cast
Read VO Blog
Listen to professional news casters
Prep radio show for the weekend
Read Chapter in VO book

I was wrong.report.8.28.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful, recovering COE and I was abstinent yesterday

Plan of Action

Pray
Submit Meal Plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 4 outreach calls
Make 4 outreach texts
Start next chapter of 12/12 for step work
Read Daily Readers
Read Chapter in VO Book
Listen to session
Listen to news from 7/19
Listen to wbz news casters
practice script

one thing.report.8.27.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful, recovering COE and I was abstinent yesterday

Not a bad day in all, I am still not feeling well and I am getting sick and tired of being sick and tired. I am taking my meds as I am supposed too. I am trying to stay as hydrated as I can, get as much sleep as I can, and take other actions to help keep myself physically healthy. Yet certain health issues still plague me, and I do not believe they are weight related.

I am growing tired of calling my DR, well Nurse Practitioner only to be told to go to the clinic. Its the same crap over and over again, either they say to go home and tough it out, or they give me antibiotics and send me on my way. The symptoms seem to get worse with each episode and I am not happy with the care I am getting. I am just unsure what action to take, what tests do I ask for? What can I do to find a solution? If the people I depend on for care aren't taking it seriously or don't have any answers it leaves me in a difficult situation. I realize I live in a small town, I realize they are busy but got dammit its my life and health we are dealing with. I will pray to my HP and see if any answers some while I try to figure out what to do.

Plan of Action

Pray

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Make 4 outreach calls

Make 4 outreach texts

Start next chapter of 12/12 for step work

Read Daily Readers

Read Chapter in VO Book

Listen to session

Listen to news from 7/19

Listen to wbz news casters

practice script

money talks.report.8.25.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday however my behavior was slippery.

A taste of something here, and extra little something there. I pushed the boundaries of abstinence without breaking them and I realize I cannot continue to do this or I will binge/slip again.

I am doing step work with a sponsor today, this will help me move forward. I also need to do the work in another program that my addiction is running wild in.

I now see the connection between all my addictions. If 3 of them are under control so to speak, and one of them is running rampant then I am blindly treading on thin ice. Well not blindly anymore, not I realize that if one thing is out of order they are all out of order. I cannot be at peace physically, mentally, and spiritually if one of my demons is tormenting me. In the past the why has eluded me, I could not figure out why I was so miserable because 3 of my addictions were quiet, I guess I did not give the 4^th one the respect it deserve, I under estimated it.

Today I will work to bring peace and harmony to my life working the program, using the tools and doing my action plan

POA:

Pray

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Make at least 2 outreach calls

Make at least 2 outreach text's

Do BB study with sponsor

Read daily readers

Listen & study news cast that coach said was good

Read over scripts and practice

Edit lesson to be used for practice

listen to 2 news casts of Boston website

Read VO book

Do meditation

Look over and do breath/ VO exercises

Southern Cross.report.8.23.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

I am starting to come out of my funk I was in after my slip a few days ago. I kept coming back despite my actions, my heart really wasn't in it initially. That did lead me to a little slippery behavior in the days following, but today I feel good. I started my day with prayer and I am ready to face whatever is ahead of me.

Plan of Action

Pray

Submit meal plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Make 2 outreach calls

Make 2 outreach texts

Read OA daily readers

Read 2 pages in BB

Read Chapter in VO book

Listen to WBZ newscasters

still counting.report.8.22.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE I was abstinent yesterday

Plan of Action

submit meal plan
call phil
pray before/after meals
text phil before/after meals
make 2 outreach calls
make 2 outreach texts
read daily readers
read 2 pages in BB and make up pages
read chapter in VO book
listen to boston news casters
practice scripts
attend meeting or listen to one

mental health.report.8.21.14

Good morning

My name is Greg, I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday.

I have to admit I don't feel very grateful today, not that I don't appreciate what I have; I am just still struggling, white knuckling it.

I have not felt this way for a good long time now, that feeling of faithless, hopeless action. I did not enjoy this stage when I went through it the first time, I sure as hell don't like it now. I guess its a good refresher that no matter how much time you have long or short some things never disappear fully and may come back to haunt at some point.

Plan of Action

Submit meal plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Read Daily Readers

Read 2 pages in BB

Make 2 outreach calls

Make 2 outreach texts

Be of service

Read VO Scripts

Practice VO Scripts

Read Chapter in VO book

Listen to News station

PS: the irony of Quiet Riots Mental Health playing as I write this is not lost on me *chuckles*

master of puppets.report.8.20.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a compulsive over eater.  Yesterday was the first time in a long time I willfully, deliberatly broke my abstinence.  I was struggling off an on through the day, I prayed, made some outreach calls.  Last night things came to a head and the feelings were overwhelming and I gave in to multiple addictions.  I had not felt like that in a long time.  I have struggled over the last year but have not had deal with that debilitating almost uncontrollable painful urge to just give in.

Initially it felt so good like a huge weight had been lifted off me, I actually felt more at ease and at peace, for about 5 minutes until the shame and self loathing started.  Todays another day

Plan of Action
Pray
Submit meal plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts
Do a phone meeting
Read Daily Readers
Read in VO book
Read 2 pages in BB
Listen to Boston Newscasts
Practice Scripts

Your Love.report.8.19.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was not abstinent yesterday.

Little things mounted up into major things which led to to compulsive behavior. At the base of everything is the uncomfortable feelings of dealing with one of my addictions. Abstaining from this addiction is causing uneasy feelings that mount more and more everyday. The last week or so I have noticed a heightened consciousness of all of my addictions and the thought of indulgence. Its only food I have acted out with.

I will pray and put more work into my programs today to help combat these feelings of unrest and uneasiness. It feels like there is a savage battle raging just under my skin, I can feel it now as I sit here writing this , this nervous energy that almost seems to make my body vibrate, its feels like anti-excitement, instead of being fun an anticipation its dark, foreboding and I can't even think of the other word I wanted to use.

I have felt antsy and full of explosive destructive behavior the last few days, I have thought about doing things I have not done since I was in my 20's, just causing havoc for my own amusement. I was able

to identify that while it was happening and with the help of my Higher Power keep my head about me instead of doing whatever I wanted .

Plan of Action

Pray

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Make 2 out reach calls

Make 2 out reach texts

Attend 9:45 phone meeting

Read 2 pages in BB

Read Daily Readers

Read chapter in VO book

Edit VO session files

Practice one script

Listen to Boston News Station

still the one.report.8.18.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday


Plan of Action
Pray
Submit meal plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts
Read Daily Readers

hero of the day.report.8.15.14

Good morning

My name is Greg, I am a grateful recovering COE. I was abstinent yesterday

I am having a good morning, started doing some exercies at work.  I did some pushups and did a few laps around the floor our office is on.  At first I got caught up in the number I was doing and how it should be higher. Then I settled down and will just focus on doing what I need to do.  Each week I will add 1 pushup, I will do at least 2 laps and probably more as I did this morning.  I will keep adding laps as time progresses.

Plan of Action

Pray
Submit meal plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts
Read Daily Readers
Read 2 pages in BB and 12/12
Read a Chapter in my VO book
Practice my scripts for tomorrow & listen to last weeks lesson

come with me now.report.8.14.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was not abstinent yesterday.  I started to say that I was but in reality I wasn't.  I did great most of the day stuck to the plan.  I started working with a sponsor in another program last night, we talked about defining sobriety in it.  it was uncomfortable dealing with the issues that addiction brings up. We discussed abstaining from behaviors for a period of 30 days.  I had a snack before bed which I did not report in.  Reflecting back on it now I think I was upset over the restrictions the new program put on me so I ate over it.  I did not realize it at the time, it was not until right now I realized that.

This is going to be a long, painful journey as I work to untangle this addiction from my life, I will need prayer and working with my OA sponsors, and support from my 12 step brothers and sisters to stay on point.

Plan of Action
Pray
Submit meal plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Read 2 pages in BB & 12/12
Make 2 out reach calls
Make 2 out reach texts
Read a chapter in my VO book
Practice my scripts from last week & listen to lesson

king nothing.report.8.13.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday. Had a good day, connected with some new people via the phone meeting so that was nice, I can never have enough program contacts :)

Plan of Action

Pray

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Do phone meeting today

make 2 out reach calls

make 2 out reach texts

read daily readers

read 2 pages in 12/12 and BB

reach chapter in my VO book

listen to last weeks VO session and edit it for usage

check out Boston news site

sweet emotion.report.8.11.14

Good morning

my name is Greg, I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

Plan of Action

Pray
Submit Meal Plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Read Daily Readers
Get Allergy Shot
Attend 9:45 Phone Meeting
Read 2 pages in BB & 12/12
Read Chapter in my VO book
Listen to Saturdays Lesson & Practice
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts

Don't go away mad, just go away.report.8.9.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

It was an interesting day yesterday, I got my car back to the tune of $320 which kinda bummed me out initially, it seems like there is always something to spend money on I cannot get ahead.

Then I realized I am grateful the garage fixed it, I am grateful they let me take the car with no money and they allow me to make payments. If it was not for them I would be sunk so I didn't dwell on it long and I was very grateful.

My day kind of took a dark turn in the afternoon. A friend of mine who I kind of knew over the years, he worked at a local grocery store I frequent, we would talk and shoot the breeze anytime we saw each other. I liked him he was a soft spoken really nice guy. One day he was just gone from the store and I did not see him for a while. We later connected through facebook and then started hanging out. He is a lot younger than I am but we come from similar background filled with abuse, he battles his own addictions as well. I like him, his wife and kids are all great. I spend as much time with him as possible, its a good sober environment for me to hang out in. He is not in program but I do talk to him about stuff from time to time, I try not to push it on him, last night he slipped up and threw away 4 months of sobriety. He called me on the phone and told me he was drinking and driving around, I told him to get home and I would be right there. When I got to his house he was not there, to make a long story short he had an accident and went off the road. When I found him he was in the woods, the police and ambulance were already on the way, he was just slumped over in his car. They got him out and to the hospital and thankfully he was not hurt. It was very sobering to me to see the consqeuences of indulging addiction, granted mine are a bit different and the consequences are not always so sudden and in your face, but it shook me up the none the less. I sat with the family and watches all the pain they were going through, it was hard to watch but I was there to do my best to support them which I did. This was a wake up call for me, and it let me know I need to start taking care of my own business before I have my own “accident” I don't want to have a heart attack, or lose any toes or my feet due to diabetes. So far both of those things have been good and under control, however getting back into the food will lead me down a dark and deadly path that I might not recover from

Plan of Action

Pray

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Do a phone meeting today

Read 2 pages from BB and 12/12

Get with my sponsor about continuing step work

Read a chapter in my VO book

Check out news site

Bad Medicine.report.8.8.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

Not much to say still feeling not that fantastic but I got up and got to work today.  My car broke down yesterday which just seemed to add to the pile.  I have to admit I was pretty p***** off yesterday.  It seemed like one thing after another on top of not feeling well.  But in the grand scheme of things I survived, I didn't over eat all ended well

Plan of Action

Pray
Submit Meal Plan
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Read 2 pages in BB and 12/12
Read my Daily Readers
Make 2 outreach texts
Make 2 ourtreach calls
Attend 9:45 Phone meeting
work on some homework I was given
Check out 1 VO Website
Practice my Scripts
Read VO Book

hesitate.report.8.7.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE I was abstinent yesterday

Still battling whatever it is wrong with me, I am hoping to be able to move past it tomorrow and get back to work, I cannot afford to be out much longer

Plan of Action

Submit Meal Plan
Pray
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil Before After Meals
Do 9:45 phone meeting
Do Daily Readers
read 4 pages in BB and 12/12
Read my Voice Over book as much as I can
Check out news site
read over scripts for weekend, practice if voice allows

safety dance.report.8.6.14

Good afternoon

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

I've been sick a few days and I have been slacking on my program.  I am getting my report done, I have sent in my meal plan, I will call my sponsor, I am about to attend a program meeing, I will reach out to others, I have already made a few program texts.  I will read my daily readers and reach two pages in the BB and 12/12.  I will also pray, these are the actions I will take to get back on track

so far away.report.8.4.14

Good morning

my name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday. It was a weird weekend, not really bad just weird. I was totally out of my recovery mode, I didn't binge but my meals were all over the place on Saturday, I had an extra meal that I didn't plan on because things were so disorganized and out of place. I don't count Saturday as a abstinent day for me, I can't even really pinpoint why, I didn't do anything unhealthy, like I said it just felt like a mess and not much recovery was involved. On a positive note I did see a fantastic movie Saturday with my nephew called Guardians of the Galaxy it was AMMMAZZZZZINGGGG. I loved it, probably the best movie I have seen in years. I got to go on a fun yet harrowing 4 wheeler ride. We ended up in some of the worst conditions I have ever seen **chuckles** granted I am new at this whole thing but still it was something else, were it not for the bugs that binged their butts off on me I might have been able to enjoy it. However I seem to have what they want and they were after me in full force, my buddy said I had a cloud of them following me, I got chewed up pretty badly. Suffice to say I was happy to get home and swore I would not go for another ride anytime soon, then I got up yesterday morning and felt the itch to ride go figure **chuckles**

Plan of Action

Start my day with prayer

Submit Meal Plan

Call Phil

Pray before/after meals

Text Phil before/after meals

Make 2 outreach calls

Make 2 outreach texts

Make 2 outreach emails

Get Allergy Shot

Attend 9:45 phone meeting

Read 2 pages in BB/12/12

Read Daily Readers

Read my VO book, determine how many pages I will have to read a day to finish by Saturday

Listen to Last Weeks lesson and practice script

Read new script and try and analyze

Listen to News site

Check out one new VO website

Rocky Mountain High.report.8.1.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday

Submit meal plan
Pray
Call Phil
Pray before/after meals
Text Phil before/after meals
Make 2 outreach calls
Make 2 outreach texts
Read Voice of Recovery and For Today
Read 2 pages in my BB
Read as much as I can in my VO book to catch up
Check out 1 VO site
Listen to my weekend lesson and practice my scripts
Get out and walk around the block