Sound of madness.report.1.2.14

Good morning

My name is Greg I am a grateful recovering COE, I was abstinent yesterday.

Not much to say this morning, as Phil says when things are going well there isn't really much to say.  He has been texting me the last few days warning me to be vigilant as this time of year people tend to go out and he knows people who are going out.  Thats always a bit scary for me, that we are always a step away from going out again. I always used to "assume" that once we got abstinent we were "safe" yes silly I know now.  When my sponsors tell me they are always one step away, one unhealthy choice away from relapse that used to terrify and confuse me.  I figured if they could be one step away then I was totally screwed.

Now I know that I just need to take the right actions everyday, days that things do not go well Phil will ask me if I called people, if I read literature, did a meeting or listened to a speaker.  Usually if the answer is no my day has not been that great.  There are always days where I take the right action and still did not have a very good day, but I don't always have to feel great, nor does my day have to be all sunshine and puppies for it to be a good, abstinent day.  Doing the right thing isn't always convenient, and doesn't always feel good, but no one ever promised me it would.

Well I guess I had more to say than I thought I did *chuckles* I guess my HP is speaking through me, I had no intention of writing more than a few sentences.  I heard a speaker one time who said he has shared at meetings before and thought "WOW that is amazing stuff I need to write that down" but he could not remember what he said, they were not his words his HP was speaking through him.  I always found that very profound.

POA for the day (plan of action)

Pray (did it as soon as my feet hit the floor)
submit meal plan (did it)
stick to my meal plan, report any changes
pray before and after my meals
text Phil before and after my meals
Call Phil Daily
email James (done)
email the loop and others
send out my WOE/Grat
make recovery calls
read literature and listen to another There is a Solution speaker
Meditate for 5 minutes
Read up on more ways to meditate
read a few pages my book 10 ways to Zen